What are the practical mental, physical, emotional and financial steps for the hours, days, weeks, or months leading up to a next-level experience of luxurious pleasure at Sheri’s Branch, the premiere legal brothel?
It’s a pick-your-pleasure adventure—and following these tips will lead you to maximum satisfaction. Set yourself up to have the best time ever!
1.
Decide to go.
Commit and CHILL.
Convincing is not sexy—for you, or us.
Go when it’s a fuck yes.
Trust yourself.
2.
Decide what you want.
Pick a focus.
[tease ALL future in-depth episodes on types of party] GFE? Kink or fetish? Blowjob because you never get them? Intimacy? Someone who can hold you in pain, grief, tender discovery, a new edge? Someone to guide you through your confusion?
Articulate specifics.
You will need to be able to verbally communicate—at least a little—with the courtesan you work with.
Write it down or use my checklist if you’re worried sharing this out loud might be tough
For fetish, kink and BDSM negotiations, be extra-prepared:
What exactly are you looking to experience and feel—emotionally, sensation-wise, connection-wise?
Come prepared to describe your experiences so far and define terms as you understand them.
What elements really get you going—words, implements, specifics of dynamics?
Energetic? Physical? Sensuality? Pain? Contexts? Curiosities?
Use my negotiation worksheet if needed
NOTE: specialty scenes of higher risk (i.e. impact play) will require a waiver
Stay open.
You don’t need to have every detail planned—in fact, it’s better if you don’t.
3.
Budget and plan.
What kind of experience did you imagination dream up? Budget for it.
Three, four and five-figure parties are all regular occurrences, sometimes six plus ones pop up under the right circumstances.
Luxury experiences are luxury prices; basic experiences are basic. If you have a multi-part, multi-lady, or hyper-specific fantasy, budget for luxury.
I always recommend planning and saving up if you find yourself worried about budget. You will value your experience more when you yourself are actually invested.
Get to know the ladies
Look at the ranch’s website and read the profiles to see who is a good fit for your desires.
If you feel strongly called to one, reach out and say hi via email, and book an appointment.
If you aren’t sure, make a list of ladies you’d like to meet, request your top choice upon arrival and go from there.
Especially if you have something specific in mind, and especially if it’s your first time meeting a lady, bring specialty items you may need, i.e.
A certain outfit you want me to wear
A specific implement you want me to use on you
Personal or single-use sex toys—i.e. anything I can’t easily sterilize or put a condom on: cock rings, butt plugs, dildos that are exactly your favorite size, the one toy that helps you climax etc
Adult-sized hopper ball
Pies and cakes and dropcloths for a splashing session
Book your flight.
Pick a hotel or stay at Sheri’s.
Rent a car.
Definitely rent a car if you want the most bang for your buck.
All car services (Lyft, Uber, private cars) severely limit our ability to be flexible in the packages we can offer.
If the cost of a car rental is daunting, definitely keep saving.
Confirm with your lady of choice if you make an appointment and introduce yourself.
4.
Prepare your mind and body and bank accounts.
In the months, weeks and days leading up: take good care of yourself.
Only tell supportive, sex-positive friends about your upcoming adventure.
Eat well. Avoid sugar, alcohol, and anything else that triggers your system. Focus on whole foods and getting the nutrients you need.
Move your body.
Have you had a physical lately? Gotten blood work? Had an STI panel? Check your baselines.
Possible party-blockers: abnormal discharge, open cuts or sores (including from ingrown hairs, depending on where it is), warts, yeast, jock itch, unidentifiable rashes etc might require a no-sex gloves-on party
Party on as usual: pearly penile papules, age spots (angiokeratomas), d*cks and c*nts of all shapes and sizes
Get curious about yourself. Journal, meditate, go to therapy, try a new creative practice or take a class.
Can be erotic or non-erotic.
Follow your heart, follow your part.
What do you notice about your internal voice(s)?
Lower your stress.
What do you need? Treat yourself.
How do you need to practice receiving?
Hone your grooming habits.
If you have a foreskin: make sure to pull it back and gently wash with soap and rinse with water regularly.
If you want to shave or groom pubic hair (not required): use razors like this to avoid nicks, and practice before the big day.
Get your sleep on lock.
Hydrate, hydrate, hydrate.
Make sure you can access money, or visit the ranch during the business hours of your local bank in case any pesky fraud alerts try and stand in your way.
Note: Sheri’s Ranch is notorious for having terrible cell coverage on certain carriers—especially Verizon. T-mobile is usually okay. Everything else is a wildcard.
5.
Carry out your plan and visit the ranch!!!
Let the turn-on start even before you leave for Vegas.
What if you edge yourself for a week leading up to your trip?
What if you spend a few minutes each day imagining everything you want?
Are you willing to be wildly surprised in deeply satisfying ways?
Drive (yourself!) through the beautiful desert and/or mountains.
Use this time to drop into your body, your desire, your excitement.
Hydrate!
Upon arrival have your ID or passport (if non-US) ready
Bar (walk-ins): left door entrance; the bartender, security or hostess will check your ID
Parlor (appointments): right door entrance; the hostess or customer service rep will check your ID
Meet Your Lady
If you have an appointment: tell the person checking your ID; they will direct you accordingly.
If you don’t have an appointment but you know who you’d like to talk to, let the hostess know you have a request.
My recommendation: request your top choice first and chat with her. If you don’t vibe, then request your next choice.
Multi-lady requests are also an option, but require an investment of all ladies’ time. If you do this, please limit your request to no more than 3 ladies, and be prepared to tip all courtesans whose time you receive, whether or not you party with them.
Be prepared to wait a few minutes unless you’ve called ahead to make an appointment.
If you want to try the “speed dating” option where ladies randomly approach you, you may ask for a bar call.
Avoid this if you are very nervous and stick to requests, or wait until your nervous system settles down.
It is rude to request a bar call if you have no intent of partying.
It’s polite to tip every lady you talk to!
It’s polite to keep conversations short if you know you don’t want to party with a courtesan.
It’s polite to be a good conversationalist and add value with your interactions—no matter what!
My preferred alternatives to a bar call:
If you see an available courtesan in the bar you are interested in, approach her and politely introduce yourself.
Ask for a bar line—a cross between a bar call and a lineup where ladies approach you in the bar to say hello in a minute or less each.
If you want to try the famous real-life tinder experience, request a lineup:
You sit on the couch in the parlor.
All currently available ladies will line up and introduce themselves.
You pick one and go off with her to discuss specifics.
If you want multiple ladies:
I recommend starting with your top choice lady and plan on adding in friends once you and she have discussed specifics together.
Chat and Connect
Humans need to sound, smell and feel right to each other.
Negotiate
Feelings check
Desire discovery
Mutual overlap
[see: How to Brothel Part 5: Negotiation Tips]
Visual Health Inspection
Make it Official: the booking process
Pants up: head back to the office
Cash or credit or a mix?
Credit cards require two signatures and two thumbprints; paperwork is shredded later.
Playtime!!!!!
Allow yourself to SAVOR the experience.
Corporate requires us to shower you if we are getting personal!
Head to the specialty room of your choice or back to the lady’s room.
PARTY!
Options aftercare and come-down:
Cuddles
Shower again
Tips of all sizes are DEEPLY appreciated!
Leave your lady a review on Sheri’s and Google
Farewell-for-Now!
Exit Interview: we leave you on the couch in the parlor, and the hostess or customer service rep will come out to check in with you.
6.
Reintegration
Write your courtesan an email.
Journal and/or debrief with a willing, supportive sex-positive friend.
Maintain the high baselines you developed in your preparation.
How can you extend your experience of pleasure to your everyday life?
What else would you like to experience?
7.
Plan your next trip—and bring a friend :)
Maybe that supportive sex-positive friend wants to join? And their spouse…?
8.
How my favorite clients have prepared for me:
Clear, respectful communication and a desire to connect.
Setting an appointment.
Edging.
Making an effort to get to know me through providing value—in words, photos, compliments, and wish list gifts.
Healthy boundaries and being on the same page about the scope of our joyful co-creation.
Developing trust to invite mutual adoration, delight and vulnerability.
Showing up with kindness and a good attitude.
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