How do you treat a lady? What is accepted behavior around legal courtesans, staff and other guests once you arrive at a ranch?
In a time where social norms are either never established—like in online spaces—or where the underlying assumptions shift wildly from community to community, it would be helpful to have a handbook.
Here’s a list of ten ways to be a proper gentle-person at a legal brothel—with some please-do-not’s at the end.
The main takeaway? Treat other human beings—no matter where you are—with curiosity, compassion and kindness.
Read on for specifics of how you can make a great connection at a legal brothel whether you’re stopping by just for lunch, a tour, to play with a lady, or to make our collective Orgy Dream Party in Playland come true.
IN-PERSON BROTHEL ETIQUETTE TIPS:
1.
Be polite to everyone you encounter.
Keep your hands to yourself; let courtesans initiate touch.
Use professional language for introductions; save dirty talk for playtime
We might hint at raunchy in the bar, but keep it PG-13.
Direct explicit speech (keep it polite!) about activity happens during the negotiation in a ladies’ room.
Dirty talk happens during a party.
A little politeness goes a long way in any scenario you might encounter a lady.
Lineup: act appreciative, smile, and thank the ladies when it’s finished.
Bar: be friendly, respectful, and clear in your intentions.
Appointment: follow your courtesan’s lead when it comes to handshakes, hugs and hellos—and bonus points if you bring flowers or a gift from her wishlist!
Not just ladies—
Other guests: keep it classy and friendly and look for their social cues.
Hostess: do NOT ask anyone who does not work as a legal courtesan if you can “have them”
Bartender: do tip them and treat them well!
Security: if you arrive with a bag, they’ll need to check it. Please be cool!
Shift Manager behind the front desk: whether you’re checking into the hotel or booking a party, they will laugh and joke with you, but please keep comments G or PG.
Staff does not work at a ranch to fantasize about us ladies and you together.
Even when the hostess checks in with you at the end of a party to see how it went, they don’t need to know every lurid detail.
Save glowing specifics for profile reviews!
2.
Be friendly if you wish to get friendly.
Hopefully you didn’t come to the ranch to meet a lady and get married
Although we DO offer wife-for-a-week packages
And/or do encourage you to bring your bride, groom, or bachelor/ette parties here!
The best sex happens with a bit of mutual trust—which we build with a little friendly connection
Mutual pleasure comes from mutual curiosity and discovery. In every interaction, ask yourself:
What do we have in common?
What can we learn from each other?
What makes them tick?
Where is our overlap?
Are we having fun?
3.
Generosity is a two-way street and comes in many forms!
What are the most easy, fun ways for you to be a giver in your interactions?
Kindness, friendliness, appreciation and genuine curiosity are free
Be a good conversationalist:
Are you asking and answering questions thoughtfully?
Are you open to connecting?
Are you listening to learn?
Ladies adore concrete appreciation!!!
We LOVE tips of all sizes!
We LOVE when you grant wishes from our lists and make fantasies come true!
Check links for links to wishlists and tipping platforms since we aren’t always allowed to post them.
My favorite clients read my profile and know that I can’t drink and that I really love dark chocolate, flowers, outfits, or healthy snacks.
One of my most thoughtful clients ever brought me a big bag of freeze-dried fruit because he knows I like proper nourishments.
If you are looking for a bargain in a human being or are trying to take value without offering something in return, ask yourself—why?
Deconstruct your narratives around scarcity and deserving before you visit.
We ALL deserve pleasure, luxury, and enjoyment in life—if you disagree, avoid pleasure-centered luxury spaces.
Is your desire in balance?
If you want to receive something, please offer something of proportionate value. Personally, I only enjoy being with people who value me—in all contexts :)
4.
Converse to connect.
Let go of your fear of strangers.
Let go of your stories about how you’re awkward.
Let go of the hate of small talk—it’s a chance to connect.
Explore your curiosity to find your overlap.
Ask how people feel about aspects of their life (hometown, job, hobby etc) rather than sticking to flat information-based questions.
Let yourself be human one sliver of vulnerability at a time.
5.
Be conscious of your time together.
At Sheri’s, courtesans have:
10 minutes in the bar to chat
10 minutes if we talk specifics in our room
A little buffer time if we do a tour
A little buffer time before and after your party (shower etc)
Practice staying aware of time without getting anxiously obsessed with it—
Stay present, calm, and breathe.
Seconds can last for ages at this oasis if you let yourself slow down, breathe and stay in the now with me.
Remain generous of spirit—touch sweetly, use loving, respectful words of appreciation and delight (or if you discover you’re the same type of dirty talker and your partner is on the same page, that can be sweet, too).
Show your appreciation and avoid secret asks for more. It’s way hotter and more likely to be satisfying if you sweetly, clearly and politely beg me for five more minutes with me than it is to have you go “c’mon, just a little longer so I can go again” as you paw at me, or dragging your feet like an angry preteen putting on shoes when it’s time to go.
6.
Be clear on your wants and needs.
Physically.
Tell partners if you have allergies, an injury, or anything relevant to safer play.
Remember that courtesans are not officially allowed to party with intoxicated individuals.
Please stay home if you are ill, even if it’s just a cold :)
Mentally.
Journal ahead of time to get clear if needed.
Refrain from dumping on your practitioner until after you have received consent and booked your party.
What are you hoping to get out of the session? Set an intention.
Emotionally.
Your feelings are valid.
If you are uncomfortably full of an unhelpful feeling, consider working through it with a qualified support professional before visiting.
You will have the most fun when you show up available for fun!
Financially.
I personally think it’s really hot when people save up for me. Offically speaking, we can only get specific about activity and price in our rooms at the ranch on the day of our party—but as with literally anything in and around Vegas, all budgets are available, and luxury experiences have luxurious price tags.
7.
Do your best to communicate.
Before:
In your negotiation, tell your parter of your choice what you want! Since you’re prepared from the above step, you should be ready to go.
Write it down and read or hand it to the lady if it feels too hard to say out loud (but also, you can totally just say it out loud—courtesans have heard it all).
It’s okay if you’re nervous, just be willing to let the nerves go and don’t obsess on your nervousness. It’s fine if you’re calm, too.
Good attitudes are hot.
During:
Check in before sticking fingers in places, any hair pulling or slapping.
You and your partner can develop a dialogue together that you’re both comfy with—remember everyone’s comfort levels with dirty talk are different; check in before surprising someone with a degrading term.
Check in throughout play to hone your giving and receiving with a new partner.
I always love knowing what people love or want more of, and invite people to tell me if they love so mething, ask if they are inspired to receive or give something or if they want to experience a certain feeling or sensation again.
After:
I’m a good fan of a debrief.
What did you love?
What else does it inspire?
How did something feel, specifically?
I also love sharing other stories, curiosities, or chatting about shared interests and life during wind-down cuddle time.
8.
Make and stick to to your agreements, including all required safer sex practices.
Talking about it ahead of time is totally hot—especially when collaborating on a delicious, sensual plain tailored to your desires.
Take up to 10 minutes in a courtesan’s room to go over feelings, desires and budget and craft your party.
Once a booking is made official in the office, if you want to add an activity or a particular amount of time beyond what was initially discussed, you would have to return to the office to rebook.
Fluid exchange is forbidden—this means it’s important to remember:
Kissing is NOT assumed.
Always use lube instead of spit.
Condoms and dental dams or Lorals are required for all oral and penetrative sex.
It is your job as a partner to do your best to make sure the agreed-upon safety methods are properly in place and in tact.
Always warn your partner(s) if you are about to come outside a condom.
9.
Remember we LOVE tips of all sizes!
We love them!!!
Concerete Appreciation is hot.
Most of us who work here have a money kink.
10.
Leave a review and tell your friends how lovely we are!!!!
On the courtesan’s website profile.
On google.
[READ NEXT: EPISODE XXX — THE TALENTED GODDESSES OF SHERI’S RANCH ]
BAD BEHAVIORS TO AVOID WHEN VISITING A LEGAL BROTHEL + BETTER OPTIONS:
1.
AVOID rudeness.
This includes vulgar speech, name calling, and touching a person or their things—closet door handles, clothing, shoes, artwork, instruments, really anything that does not belong with you—without permission.
PRACTICE kindness and curiosity to connect and offering legal courtesans appreciative amounts of tribute before trying to touch.
2.
AVOID asking staff if they are available for courtesan services, and vice versa.
This includes hostesses, security, bartender, drivers, customer service reps etc.
PRACTICE asking questions when you don’t know how things work and kindness.
3.
AVOID complaining, trauma dumping and digging for personal information.
Especially in an introductory chat!
Not only is this not a great way to connect with a new person, therapy roleplay and personal interrogations are specialty offerings that require negotiation!
If you’re in a place where your trauma defines your identity, working with a qualified licensed therapist you vibe with is also recommended.
PRACTICE building trust in a way that supports the connection you’re seeking and includes a back and forth.
What do you love?
Where is your mutual overlap?
How might you enjoy connecting today?
If you aren’t interested in connecting deeply with a lady at the ranch, it’s polite to release her early on in a compassionate manner.
4.
AVOID smoking in a lady’s face.
Unless that’s the specific kink party you negotiate)
PRACTICE connecting to others without the crutch of a substance or prop.
5.
AVOID whorephobic behaviors.
This specific strain of rudeness could look like someone who is:
Obsessed with the "fakeness" or “realness” of names.
Gawking or other behaviors normally associated with zoo patrons.
Conversation that mainly consists of “I can’t believe this exist” and “I can’t believe you do this, how on earth do you do this?!” themes
PRACTICE: treating all people like people, living in alignment with your choices, sharing per your comfort level in ways that show respect, getting curious about the parts of yourself that push other parts of yourself into deep discomfort, explore those parts through journaling or with a therapist instead of forcing an unsuspecting human being to process your unexamined feelings for free, or at least tipping them if you realize you accidentally stumbled into this pattern.
6.
AVOID whorephilic behaviors and fetishization.
Or pretending you are a coworker when you are not.
Or using the words whore, ho, hooker, prostitute, courtesan etc. without context about how the actual sex worker in your presence feels about that word, and without establishing a rapport.
Loving a sex worker “so much” just because they are a sex worker can miss their humanity just as much as the fear-based interactions.
PRACTICE: getting to know the unique individual before you and follow their lead when it comes to preferences for connection and slutty talk, or ask if you aren’t sure.
7.
AVOID breaking agreements with your partner(s)
Or telling a sex worker when you are.
Or bringing any courtesan into any drama related to someone close to you discovering your location, or “catching” you via location services, phone call, FaceTime etc.
Your personal business is your personal business.
Sex workers only need to know details that are relevant toy our time together.
The ranch is not a backdrop to a reality show, and no courtesan has signed up to be anyone’s priest, or judge, jury or executioner.
PRACTICE: getting honest with yourself and your partners about your desires and living in integrity with the choices you make.
I love married clients who visit me with their partner’s blessing!
Or even better…with their partner!!!
8.
AVOID convincing or needing to be convinced.
Boundary-pushing a new-to-you human is rapey, not sexy
If you aren’t comfortable with what you want, it might be hard for you to enjoy your experience and could lead to feelings of shame and regret later.
PRACTICE: owning your desire and curiosity. What if it’s okay to want what you want?
9.
AVOID wasting time with nervousness and last-minute miserliness.
Decide to invest in your personal pleasure and allow yourself to enjoy the entire process.
If you discover you’re extremely nervous upon arrival, give your system time to settle before connecting with your courtesan.
Be kind and generous of spirit, no matter what.
PRACTICE: goodwill and appreciation! Negotiate an agreement easily and quickly to spend your administrative buffer time cuddling and having fun instead of haggling over dollars.
10.
AVOID my #1 turn-off: telling a sex worker they should be paying you.
You should go [fuck] do yourself.
Apply these basic courtesies to every person you interact with and tell us what you discover!
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